I was a 28-year-old female with a 22-month-old son; I drank everyday morning to night. I met a divorced man who had a young daughter, who drank just like I did. The drinking didn’t last long; I knew I loved this man and if I kept drinking I would lose him and my son. I cried out for God to help me, and I ended up in a rehab in Lancaster, PA at White Deer Run. They told me I should not go back to this man because he drinks; but they couldn’t tell me what to do.
I completed the twenty-eight-day program and returned to the man and my son; when I returned home he was sober too. We went to AA meetings for about three months, but we stopped and started going to church. Everything was perfect for us, we got married, had a son together, and built a house.
When we were ten-years sober my husband’s daughter got leukemia and died; that’s when my husband picked drinking back up. I remained sober for the next two and a half years; at twelve years sober I picked up a drink and went right back into chaos.
Within nine months I was suicidal, and I had out a gun and wanted to die. I cried out again for God to help me, and I ended back at Lancaster White Deer Run Rehab. Once again when I got out my husband was sober!
After being three years sober my first-born son was diagnosed with the same leukemia my husband’s daughter had. He was seventeen at the time, and nine months later he died in my arms.
My husband and I did not drink through any of this, and this past April we celebrated being seventeen years sober together. We have been married for thirty years; I was sober my whole marriage except for the nine-month relapse. I thank God, White Deer Run, AA and others like me for this gift of sobriety.
Taking a drink will not make life better. I am grateful I didn’t get what I think I deserved, or I would be in jail, the hospital, or dead. I am not cured, I can still drink again. If I do, I will end up in one of those three places, and I haven’t yet!
This is why I am sharing my story, to let others know there is a solution. Live one day at a time, don’t pick up a drink with the intention of getting drunk. Not every day is a good day, but there is something good in every day. Today I face life on life’s terms, and share my experiences of strength and hope, to help the next suffering alcoholic.