"I did not abuse my meds and did what the doctors asked me to do when they asked me to do it."
After 22 years of pain management with opiate pain pills, my doctors stopped my prescription at the beginning of the opiate crisis. Even though I was in constant pain each month when I went to pain management, I pulled myself together, dressed appropriately and showed up for my appointment on time. I did not abuse my meds and did what the doctors asked me to do when they asked me to do it. I tried many alternatives as the doctors advised, but they did not help with my pain. I tried over the counter pain medications, exercise, transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation (TENS) unit, epidurals, and shots, but nothing has worked for me.
I’m divorced and live alone; my family did not provide any kind of support while I was and still am going through the worst time of my life. I do not know why, but I think it could be because they are still on the pain meds while I am not. My family does not acknowledge the opiate crisis, and we don’t communicate any more. I’m angry with them and I’m angry with the doctors. I could not understand why my world had come crashing down and the lack of support made me feel like I didn’t deserve to live. The thought of ending it all was becoming overwhelming, but I somehow got a grip and I’m still here telling my story.
This is why I am sharing my story. After 22 years of pain management and seeing doctors, I have not been back to get an opioid prescription since I was denied. I fear that I’ll be judged as an opioid addict. Although I’ve tried everything, there is nothing doctors can do for my pain without opioid pills.
